Ugh, this is my life now.  

The thought ran through my mind as I fought back tears.  I was a newlywed, riding in the car in my new town, unimpressed with my new surroundings, overwhelmed with drastic life changes.  Even though I was glad to be married, I couldn’t help but miss the friends, the job, the church I had left behind – a culture that resonated with me, a city where I had put down roots.  I was in a new chapter of my life – which was a good thing – but the scenery changed dramatically. 

I liked the old view better.

That was ten years ago, and thankfully I’ve gotten used to my new surroundings.  They’re not new anymore.  Time has helped me adapt, but what helped the most was changing my thinking – reminding myself of the correct definition of life.

As a Christ follower, my life does not exist in my job, my relationships, my calendar, my responsibilities.  My life isn’t just what I can see in front of me.  My life comes from a higher Source.  The rest – the daily stuff of life – is just circumstantial. 

It can be easy to allow circumstances to consume us and morph into our identity.  They are realities we deal with on a daily basis.  They’re on our mind when we lay in bed at night, and they’re waiting for us the next morning.  It’s all we think about when we think about us. 

Single wanting to be married, married and wanting a baby, a health scare, a family crisis, what we see in the mirror, financial abundance or scarcity, a degree with letters after our name, our title at work, the title of “Mom” – these do not define us.  They are opportunities to trust God and opportunities to serve others.  They can give direction and meaning to our life, they can greatly affect our life, but they are not our life. 

The number on the scale is not who I am.  The number of followers I have on social media is not who I am.  My unfulfilled goals and desires, my successes and struggles, others’ perceptions of me – these do not define me.  They are not who I am. 

Of course, that doesn’t mean we don’t have goals and work towards progress.  The number on the scale doesn’t define me, sure, but I’m still working to lower that number to a healthier range.  Not for looks, likes, or any reason other than wanting to steward the body God’s given me and to have energy to do all He’s called me to do. 

It also doesn’t mean we simply coast and neglect to address the looming issues in life – the catastrophes and crises, the overwhelming issues we all deal with.  When I had cancer, I met it head on. It was a focus of my prayers, my research, my mental capacity.  It consumed much of my time.

Even though these things don’t define us, they are still a big deal.  Huge!  So, we tackle these issues from a standpoint of who we are in Christ.  We filter our circumstances though the Word of God – who He is, what He’s done for us, and who He says we are.    

As Christians, our identity is not in our circumstances but in the person of Jesus and the finished work of the cross.  Because of His sacrificial death and resurrection, we can say-

• I am a new creation.  (2 Corinthians 5:17) 
• I have been given new life.  (Galatians 2:20)
• I have been adopted into His family.  (Ephesians 1:4, 5 and Romans 8:15-17) 
• I am His.  (Song of Solomon 2:16)

Cancer, money, marital status – these are not who I am.  Fill in the blank in your own life.  For me, infertility is not who I am.  It is not my identity.  It is something I deal with on a daily basis, and it has drastically affected my life, but it is not my life. 

My life is not the sum total of my circumstances.  My life is Christ.  And that life could not be more loving, more exhilarating, or more fulfilling.  It’s not perfect, but it’s a life I rejoice to live every day, regardless of the circumstances.